Adventures in Toddling

Congratulations! Someone you know has a bun in the oven and they’ve graciously invited you to buy their precious little snowflake (note: it vaguely resembles an extraterrestrial at this point—and not even cute, cuddly one like ET) a gift. After contemplating the failure of natural selection, you may wish to heartily devour this tirade about greediness. Or maybe you’re excited… whatever floats your boat.

The point is, thoughts on the merit of the invitation aside, you’re probably going to want to buy a gift. After lugging stuff home from three baby showers (two of which I wasn’t invited to and one of which I helped organize (not for my kid)) and attending several more, I feel qualified to share some practical baby shower gifting advice. Also, stay tuned for some tips on throwing a shower.

The Registry – This one is a totally obvious no-brainer, but I’ll write it anyway: If it’s on the registry, they want it. You don’t have to buy it off the registry per se, but at least use the registry as a guide. If you see that they asked for a stroller and someone bought it already, don’t buy another one. Also, don’t assume that you know which model stroller they should really have and get that instead (more on this later).

Gift receipts – Include them if you can. The parents-to-be are going to receive duplicate gifts as well as crap the don’t really want. If Target won’t take it back (it’s a crap shoot even with a receipt), your gift went to waste.

Buy for different ages – Everybody is going to buy newborn stuff. My kid could have worn a new onsie every day for the first six months and still not worn everything. Of course, we couldn’t even exchange much of it for larger sizes because we didn’t have a gift receipt and couldn’t find a store that sold it and would take it back (thanks, Target). Also, it’s entirely possible that the kid skips newborn size entirely. Besides, the cuter clothes are all in larger sizes.

Buying other stuff – If you’re an experienced parent looking at the wishlist of a soon-to-be-firsttime-parent, you’re bound to notice huge gaps, things they forgot to add or didn’t know they needed. Well, that’s what you think, anyway. Maybe they didn’t ask for the Super Ultra Deluxe HyperActivity Lights and Sounds Entertains-Your-Kid-So-You-Don’t-Have-To Machine because they’ve decided to take a different tack when it comes to parenting. Ask yourself, Are <Parents-To-Be> the type of people who would like this for their family? Also, take a look at the registry; does the product you are considering fit in with the other stuff on the registry or does it stick out like Gonzo’s nose? And for goodness’ sake, include a freakin’ gift reciept.

Consider the age and season – That sundress is adorable. Just make sure to size it so that it won’t be cold around the time she’s old enough to fit into it.

Give gift cards – All the stuff you’re buying is really just creating hassle for the parents-to-be; they’ve probably got enough on their mind as it is, and all this stuff just adds work (transporting, storing, exchanging, etc.). You might think giftcards are thoughtless, but how thoughtful is it to pick something off a registry? I think the most thoughful gift would be a giftcard with a note that says “For the <requested item>, or whatever else you’d like”. They’ll appreciate being able to pick out something they really need and will be able to stretch it further with sales and coupons. And don’t worry, you’re not burdening them with and extra trip to Babies R Us, they have to go anyways to return stuff.